Bye 2013

MANY tasks awaiting due to frequent traveling this month. so can't go for outing -.-
today is the last day of 2013, countdown is too mainstream. never like crowds.







go ahead and do it with her, not me. u belong there

River

today is our family trip, supposed to be happy, but i wasn't. unhappy moments kept happen, enuf of all the scoldings. walked alone in the dark night, nearly lost, yet i wasn't feeling anything. rather i wished i just disappear so they will b happy without me.

Cheer up

can't get myself to cheer up. no matter what i do. Tried watching movie, playing piano, cycling, reading, doodling...
hrm, had a small box of new puzzle, shall try that later. also felt like blasting songs, but my CD player was taken away and no way i could use mp3, my earpiece is spoilt :-(

only child in house for 1 wk

went sg ytd, sending off bro to qingdao for 1 wk. bad jam there, took us 4 hrs to reach. first met sis's bf, he's going uk to meet sis. am so envy of loving couples, when will be my turn.

during my way bk home, finished watching drama 49 days. i would say it's good.

woke up usual time though only slept at 4am, hrmm. did stuff for mum's clinic fb postings.

oh, i bought ronald mcdoald when bro ordered burger at the airport while waiting to board. will post pics ltr.

i'm gaining weight, it's good? but i don't feel alright

confused

here i am again, after so many months. coz i feel the need to write, to express. i was so wrong in the first place, stopped writing, as i'm afraid of letting others knowing my feelings. but now i really need a place to let it out.

what do i want? i myself don't even know. i wish i could just splurt it out but i can't. i don't wish things to get complicated. of course i hate u, no, i don't hate u at all. i want to run away, no, i don't. i'm just too afraid, i don't want to face this. it seems that i'm losing control over myself, and falling back gradually.......

thanks, i felt so happy today...but that stirred things up

iPersonic Personality Test: The Harmony-seeking Idealist

My Type:

Harmony-seeking Idealists are characterised by a complex personality and an abundance of thoughts and feelings. They are warm-hearted persons by nature. They are sympathetic and understanding. Harmony-seeking Idealists expect a lot of themselves and of others. They have a strong understanding of human nature and are often very good judges of character.

But they are mostly reserved and confide their thoughts and feelings to very few people they trust. They are deeply hurt by rejection or criticism. Harmony-seeking Idealists find conflict situations unpleasant and prefer harmonious relationships. However, if reaching a certain target is very important to them they can assert themselves with a doggedness bordering on obstinacy.

Harmony-seeking Idealists have a lively fantasy, often an almost clairvoyant intuition and are often very creative. Once they have tackled a project, they do everything in their power to achieve their goals. In everyday life, they often prove to be excellent problem solvers. They like to get to the root of things and have a natural curiosity and a thirst for knowledge. At the same time, they are practically oriented, well organised and in a position to tackle complex situations in a structured and carefully considered manner. When they concentrate on something, they do so one hundred percent - they often become so immersed in a task that they forget everything else around them. That is the secret of their often very large professional success.

As partners, harmony-seeking idealists are loyal and reliable; a permanent relationship is very important to them. They seldom fall in love head over heels nor do they like quick affairs. They sometimes find it very difficult to clearly show their affection although their feelings are deep and sincere. In as far as their circle of friends is concerned, their motto is: less is more! As far as new contacts are concerned, they are approachable to only a limited extent; they prefer to put their energy into just a few, close friendships. Their demands on friends and partners are very high. As they do not like conflicts, they hesitate for some time before raising unsatisfactory issues and, when they do, they make every effort not to hurt anyone as a result.

Career Advice:
As a Harmony-seeking Idealist you are one of the introverted personality types. Therefore you prefer a quiet work environment where you can intensively deal with your responsibilities and are not disturbed by too many people and repeated distractions. You need a lot of time to dwell on your thoughts, to put them into words and let your ideas take shape.

You are grateful for a certain measure of order and structure in order to achieve this, and being able to deal with one project after the other, thus not having a number of responsibilities at one time. You don’t like being overloaded because it is important to you to deal with things thoroughly. Your capability to concentrate is unusually great and very often you become engrossed in something and forget everything around you.

You are one of the feeler types. This fact is partially the reason that you have a very strong insight into human nature and enjoy dealing with people. You are interested in the people around you and have a real sense for their motivations, needs and abilities. Your talent to see the best in everybody and your keen wish to understand others and somehow contribute to their well-being predestine you to work with people.

Due to your propensity to be introverted you are not into holding major speeches for large audiences. Your real strength lies in working individually with people like therapists, physicians or priests. In those professions, when advancing others in their personal development or to help them in any other way is the issue, you are unbeatable.

You are extremely sensitive, and your social competences are developed above average. As a result you have no problems working with people or being a team member. Still, you should watch out to primarily surround yourself with persons who are similarly profound and eclectic. During the working day you abhor thoughtless, superficial, and insensitive colleagues.